19:38 video
I just spent an hour getting wrapped in plastic and black electrical tape, now its time to give the taper a break and give me no choice but to hang out on the bed and not move. I cant move, I barely can breath, and i'm sweating profusely beneath this very unbreathable material. My legs look welded together, my arms are crushing my lungs and Im as tightly wrapped as i ever have been in all my life. I am incredibly uncomfortable and when my dear friend leaves the room, i have to hold myself from panicking so I just talk to you (the camera) to help distract myself and explain to you a few things on how I feel and what is going on in my head. I really wish i could breath better, I wish my hands weren't numb, I wish my feet weren't numb,i then would have not called for Joe to come back and cut me out. The only reason I last as long as i did was because i am very very scared of cutting instruments. I have been accidentally cut a few times, giving me ptsd whenever scissors or any type of cutting instruments are near my skin. Joe is my best friend and I trust him but i don't trust sharp objects. As you will hear me, my fear, my genuine concern of feeling the metal against my skin, this scene is nowhere near the end in my head, this is the climax and i am scared but need out of this mummification. Joe is patient with me, but also knows i need out. Once my arms and chest are free, i feel euphoric but still know there is still more to be cut out. Once I am free, i am in a sweat covered subspace barely able to keep my thoughts and words im wanting to speak to you...but in the end, id do it again but next time with duct tape;) I suppose I am a masochist after all;)